New friend

I have a new friend that I would like to tell you about. A few weeks ago while at work I could overhear a boy being fairly loud and I could tell from the sounds of it that maybe he had autism because he reminded me of Hunter. Once I saw him I recognized him from shopping in the store before. He came up to me and held out his hand and said" tickle, tickle my hand". So, I tickled his hand. Then he said "what's your name"? I said "Deanna". He said "what's your middle name"? I said "Marie". He said "spell it,spell it slowly", so as I begin to spell it he said "whisper it quietly". So, here I am on the sales floor spelling my name to a teenager while whispering. He had on headphones like Hunter wears. I instantly felt connected to this kid. He said " when is your birthday? " I said "July 20th" He said " That is on a Monday." He said a few other things and then he ran away.

The next Wednesday evening he was back in the store again and as soon as he saw me he came  running over and whipped off his coat and said" tickle my back, tickle my back and say tickle, tickle tickle in a high pitch voice." So I did.  A guest shopping was looking at me weird but I didn't care because this kid is so cool. He asked me my name, my middle name and ran away. His parent or guardian must be somewhere in the store shopping but I have yet to see him or her.

Today, he was in with his school. He was wearing his coat with layers of silver tape over the zipper. I'm sure this helps to stop him taking off his coat. I picture him as an escape artist. Lol. He came over to me and said "Deanna, shake my hand, shake my hand with two hands." I did. His teacher or aide yells his name and tells him to be appropriate and that he is supposed to be shopping for groceries. I signaled  to the guy that he was ok. He ran away and went with his teacher. I felt bad because I felt he was in trouble for shaking my hand. His teacher had no idea that we interacted before. I did find out his name from his teacher yelling it. Maurice is his name. If I ran into his teacher I was going to explain that he has talked to me before and he is no bother. I didn't see his teacher again today but I'm sure I will again soon. Before he left he saw me and said "say gruffy and cutie" and then took off quickly. Until next time Maurice.... and BTW my birthday this year is on a Monday.

13!

I can't believe another year has already flown by. I will do a year in review since the last time I blogged. Hunter is doing good. He has another new teacher at the MCISD. Her name is Megan and she is amazing. Hunter started at the ISD with a behavior plan because of his hitting and outbursts. I am happy to report he has been able to cope and deal with his anxieties better and his teacher and social worker feel a behavior plan is no longer needed at this time. YAY! Go Hunter. His last IEP was in October 2014 and we discussed his improvements and the things he still needs to work. We are happy to report he is still excelling in his reading. Socially, he still has issues but is getting more involved with his peers. He has a couple friends at school that he talks to and about daily. Mary Jo, Sally and Michelle are his buddies. He has new bus drivers this year as well. Miss Kay(bus driver) and Kathy(aide) and they get a big kick out of Hunter. Hunter's new quirks or ticks are saying "Don't say that word." or "What color do you like.?" We hear this all day every day and so does anyone who visits. He even asks people in the grocery store what their favorite color is.

I like to include events or memories in my blog in case some day Hunter wants to read this or we can look back at it. The past year we lost my Grandpa Bobich on April 4th, 2014. My grandpa was always great to me. I would go to his house on Steffas road and sit right beside the garden and eat all of his cherry tomatoes. I would go with him, gram an cousin Jeffrey to Lake May and we would have a great time. My childhood memories of my grandma and grandpa Bobich are unforgettable. They really were amazing people. Grandpa's favorite words were Gotdamnit and Son of a bitch. Lol. But my favorite was when he said "God love her." We took Hunter to visit them often in West Branch when he was younger but Hunter didn't really get to know them as their health started to decline. But here are a few pictures I have to share.

Lake May

 

 

 

That hat!

Christmas 2013

Christmas was great for Hunter this year. He had a specific list for Santa and of course Santa was good to him getting him everything he wanted. He was able to attend the family Christmas party and even shake hands with Santa. The Petersburg Fire Dept has volunteers who dress like Santa visit homes. He interacted with his cousins and his best buddy his uncle Dale. He is slowly coming out of his unsocial shell.

It's been a long time...

I haven't posted in a long time but here is what is going on with our boy. We moved this summer  with my mother in law. Hunter has adapted pretty good with this. He asked about the white house a lot and told us he missed it. He loves living here now though. The summer of 2013 was good. We swam at the pond behind our house a lot . Hunter is a lil fish when it comes to swimming. He entered his 6th grade year at Mason Middle School. It was a challenge with a new teacher and teachers aides. After the first 2 months of episodes and meltdowns we decided as a family and teaching staff that it would be best to try to send Hunter to the MCISD. We are all nervous but it has been great. He has an awesome teacher and staff. He has more room to roam and able to be himself. In the general ed building he was in there weren't many resources or quiet areas he could go in to work through situations. I think we should have sent him to the ISD earlier but he is there now and that's all that matters.

"You were my first love." In honor and memory of my grandma Bobich

I have been having some sleepless nights lately due to mostly my job so as I lay there the other night tossing and turning trying to take my mind off of Target I start to think of my dear sweet grandma Bobich that we lost on December 7th. I think of her every day and how much I will and do miss her. All of a sudden my mind shifts to Hunter and the relationships with family and friends that he may not get a chance to encounter in life due to his autism and social skills. I immediately start thinking of all of my family mostly my grandparents and instantly get sad. I am fortunate enough to have shared my 37 years with amazing grandparents. My mom was married twice so I was blessed to have 3 sets of grandparents and great grandparents. Some of them were also married a few times so I was lucky enough to have even more. When I was a kid growing up I couldn't wait to go to Grandma and Grandpa Dennis's in Maybee for the weekend or go hang out at the ballfield in Dundee with grandma and grandpa Pilbeam. Some of my best memories are going up to Hawks to Lake May with my grandma and grandpa Bobich. My great grandparents were amazing too. Great grandma Grace's stories and jokes were full of laughs and great grandma Bobich loved to give us juicy fruit and pennies and til this day I can hear great grandpa Bobich saying " aww it's dee dee". I remember great grandma Straub cooking and taking care of great uncle Frank and great grandpa Straub playing the accordion and singing. He was a jolly ole soul. I remember my great grandpa Dennis wearing his bib overalls and sitting outside his garage every time we passed by going to grandma d's. Grandma Midge was taking care of Ronnie and Bill and always invited us in for something to eat.  My grandpa Dennis's jokes...enough said. LOL! Holidays as a kid were the best for us growing up. We had all of those family traditions as most families did. I laid there felling sorry for myself not for Hunter because he is innocent and doesn't know what he could be missing out on. All of these things I enjoyed and remember as a kid Hunter may never experience. Autism is such a mysterious thing. I get angry sometimes because we don't get to go shopping or out to eat. We can do these things yes but it is easier to keep Hunter in his comfort zone. We know we are not doing the best by getting him out and about but until you have walked in our shoes please don't judge. We are working on this more and more. He doesn't usually attend holidays, we haven't been out to eat in years as a family or even gone grocery shopping together. I went to a listen to a speaker on autism one day and they gave us an exercise to do on what goes on in the brain of an autistic child or adult and it was eye opening. They can't process thought and feelings like we do so it makes their brain seemed jumbled at every minute of the day. I am in no way saying he doesn't have a few close relationships. Hunter is very close to Cliff's mom and dad. Cliff's dad Clifford recently passed so it has been hard on all of us escpecially Hunter because he doesn't understand what heaven is. Cliff's mom June is a amazing she has helped us take care of Hunter since day one and Hunter goes there with no problem. He has his own room there. It is his second home. He is close with my brother Bro and his girlfriend Chelsea. Hunter calls her uncle Chelsea. My dad John Ray and stepmom Cheryl have been important in Hunter's life as well. They helped us out a lot with watching him when he was younger. He gets along well with my brother in law Dale and he will occasionally wrestle around with him. He has an amazing friend for life Miss Michelle( his teachers aide from preschool to 4th grade) and many other teachers and school aides as well as special bus drivers. He remembers everyone of my friends but usually will ask them to go home when they come over. He is getting a little more polite these days when our friends are visiting. All of these close relationships he has are amazing but I sometimes wish he could experience more. This entry has turned into my therapy session for myself I think. I hope I can sleep tonight after all of this blogging and to think this blog entry all started from thinking of the last words my grandma Bobich said to me before she passed which was "you were my first love."

 

Trials and Tribulations of Parenting...

 It has been 5 months since I have posted on Hunter's journey.  I am posting today because it has been a rough week for all of us at home and at school. Hunter has been doing decent with the transition into his new school. He has mostly good days but recently has had bad days. He is with an aide 95% of the day and has to be prompted to do his school work. He still isn't interacting with his classmates. He has a friend named Jacob that he really likes. He likes to hug Jacob and when he does he is to rough and thinks it is funny to not let go. They are working with him to shake Jacob's hand since at their age hugging is not appropriate at school. His speech therapist made a social story on the classroom Ipad that has pictures and story. I hope Hunter seeing this will help with this issue. He has been swearing a lot and has to be taken to the sensory room so he doesn't disrupt the classroom. It is pretty bad. I had to pick him up last 2 days due to not being able to calm him down. I curse at ourselves for allowing him to watch youtube because he finds bad things on there and repeats them. Youtube has  voiceovers on kids shows that adults have manipulated and say disgusting things and of course my child finds everyone. I am sure as you are reading this you are thinking "well shut off youtube." but I assure you it is not an easy thing to do with an ocd child with autism.  We swear and I will admit he has heard and learned things from us but things he is saying is not things we walk around the house saying. It is time to buck down and practice some tough love and this is where I feel we have failed him by letting him do whatever he wants because he has autism. I hope the days to come get better because right now I am not feeling good as a parent because my child acts like this. It may be time for professional help at this point. We have a meeting next week with the school to see what we can do for him. Please pray for us that we all make it out ok.

5th grade...

    Hunter is officially a Mason Eagle. Hunter has attended Summerfield Schools since preschool. Cliff graduated from there and I went there until 10th grade. It was a tough decision for us to change schools but it is for the best. Hunter was not actively participating in his former classroom and was spending alot of the time out of the classroom with an aide or in headphones most of the day. His very special aide Michelle Larrow who has been with Hunter since preschool suggested we see about getting him in the MOCI classroom. The MOCI classroom is adjusted curriculum per student versus teaching the entire classroom the same thing. The MOCI classroom was at Summerfield so Hunter did have some interaction with this classroom. Summerfield moved their middle school kids to the high school so it was changed to a elementary only school. The classroom is middle school aged kids so it had to be moved to a different school. The high school setting of this classroom is currently at Mason so they decided to move it there so the kids didn't have to transition again for their high school years.
    We all had so many emotions about the upcoming changes but hoped it would all work out. Hunter seemed open to going to a new school. We went to orientation and Hunter felt right at home. His new teacher Mrs. Miller seems amazing. We had a few bussing issues but I got them cleared up and we got to keep his current bus driver Peggy Brown to transport him home. That made us feel better knowing the school is about 20 minutes from home versus the 5 minutes from home. He has been doing great so far. He had a bad day when he knew I was coming to pick him up from school the second day.  I had and IEP meeting with his sending and receiving team. Once you tell Hunter something he expects it to happen and the meeting wasn't until the afternoon so he wanted to go home as soon as he got to school that day. Hunter is only 5th grade but they allowed him to go into the middle school class since it seemed what is best for him and we are very thankful for that. He doesn't have to stay in this setting of classroom until high school or even next year and can return to the regular special ed classroom but I don't see any reason as of yet to want to change. As of now this change is going smoothly...